Diagnosing Normal: A Hidden Epidemic
- Ryan Lefler, LPC
- Jun 30
- 8 min read
Like an episode of The Twilight Zone, I feel that the world around me has shifted into an unrecognizable dystopia, disguised by suburbs and screen time. Around every corner and casual conversation, I hear the utterings of some disorder or new diagnosis someone, somewhere, is going through. I can’t help but think: when did we start catching major cognitive disorders like they were springtime allergies? They even seem to be followed up by a quick 15-minute appointment with a professional, who says, “Yep, looks like you caught the anxiety! Take one of these every morning and you’ll be right as rain!”
It has become so common that society doesn't bat an eye or think anything weird of a diagnosis.
In fact, a diagnosis is the first thing most people cling to the second that something doesn’t go as planned. While the data is showing anxiety and ADHD have doubled, and depression has tripled over the last 20 years, we don’t seem to talk about the social landscape. It is present when it feels like every disorder, from narcissism to bipolar and everything in between, has increased tenfold in conversation and self-diagnosis. However, the real problem is that everyone just goes along with it. And when everyone goes along with something, true or not, it simply becomes… normal.
With that being said, I am here to shed light on a few disorders that, in my professional experience across schools and individual counseling, have consistently been misunderstood, misdiagnosed, and, overall, mistaken for normal cognitive functioning.
(Above data consolidated from sources: CDC, NIH, WHO, and peer-reviewed studies)
Anxiety
Words are important. They hold power and meaning and can, overall, affect how we perceive things. Anxiety is a term that is derived from the Latin word anxius, which is where we get the modern word anxious. The Oxford definition of anxious is “experiencing worry, typically related to uncertainty”.
So why the tangent and English lesson? It is about that word: worry. When was the last time you heard someone say they were worried? If you’re like me, I'm sure it's been a long time. Society seems to have replaced the word worry with anxiety. Anxiety, as a word, originated as the concept of excessive worry, or, simply put, problematic worry. In fact, it didn’t even become an official diagnosis until 1980.
While it might seem like semantics, it’s very important for how individuals perceive and then deal with their emotions. Feeling worried is a normal human emotion, no different from jealousy or fear. It deals in the realm of uncertainty, but (spoiler alert) we can’t see the future, thus making it very common.
The shift now is that all feelings of worry are interpreted as anxiety. Therefore, instead of feeling a very common emotion that we are challenged to grow and regulate, it has become a disorder or external factor that plagues our everyday decision-making and reactions.
You. Are. Allowed. To. Worry. If you view worry as a boogeyman we have to run from or medicate, then when do you learn to conquer it?
Anxiety disorder does exist, and there is certainly a time for diagnosis and medication. But we really need a new, or should I say, old, perspective and to ultimately stop diagnosing normal.
Depression
Depression is serious, leads to serious consequences, and should not be taken lightly. But similarly to anxiety, we now often replace the words sadness or grief with the word depression. If someone is suspected of or reporting depression, please encourage them to see a professional.
With a peek behind the curtain, the DSM-V requires a minimum of two consistent weeks with five different serious symptoms. While several days of you or someone close to you being very sad feels like an eternity, it doesn’t make you or them depressed. For the times when despairing or unfortunate things happen, guess what?
You. Are. Allowed. To. Be. Sad.
Feeling sad is not something to fight, but to embrace and walk through. It’s a common emotion we all feel- it doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. In fact, it makes you human.
ADHD
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD, is a common vocabulary word these days when discussing children. However, the major growth in the diagnosis is actually in adults. It is reported by IQVIA that adults are actually showing the most growth in ADHD and even overtaking children in several states.
Why is it that adults all of a sudden have disorders they did not even have as children? While the pharmaceutical company would tell you it’s because of better diagnostic criteria and identification, I have a different, more normal, less diagnosed perspective.
The issue is not cognitive-based but skill-based. The. Ability. To. Focus. Is. A. Skill.
And it requires training- a skill we are losing for a specific reason.
JAMA Psychiatry (2020) reported that adult ADHD quadrupled from the years 2007 to 2016. Other research shows that from the year 2007 to now, the average attention span has dropped from 12 seconds to 6 seconds. To put that in perspective: a goldfish has an attention span of 9 seconds. They passed humans in the year 2015.
Does anyone have an educated guess as to what happened in 2007 that impacted our future so greatly? That’s right, the introduction of the smartphone. Today, I believe ADHD is often not a disorder, but a symptom of minds that have learned to not focus on things for longer than a goldfish and are so overstimulated that focusing on mundane tasks such as school or homework is near impossible.
Additionally, I see parents believe their children should be able to focus with minimal instruction or practice, then assess ADHD or get the tablet the second things get difficult. There is severe harm in diagnosing ADHD inaccurately. Side effects of ADHD medication I have seen firsthand when misdiagnosed include major depression and suicidal ideation.
I hope that one day we can rebuild society's ability and skill to focus, as opposed to taking medication and blaming a disorder for typical shortcomings.
Final Thoughts
I don’t want people to distrust others or believe I think disorders are not real. They are very real and require professional help. However, I do distrust this overgrown idea of self-diagnosis and flinging around disorders like leaves in the wind.
I have witnessed people cling to disorders because it gives them an excuse to blame something external for their struggles, avoid introspection on things they need to grow and change, or otherwise avoid feeling like a bad parent or friend. It will always be easier to say, “It’s because I have…” than to take accountability for your own emotions or behaviors.
I know these are harsh realities, but blaming rather than embracing makes our ability to control ourselves near impossible in the long run. And trust me, if you're fighting what's normal, you’ll always lose.
Every Swing Brings Hope. Will You Join Us?
At Peace Partnership, we walk alongside children and families during some of the most difficult seasons of their lives—when grief, trauma, and anxiety feel overwhelming and support is out of reach.
Because of generous donors like you, we provided over 3,800 counseling sessions last year—more than 1,500 of them completely free to students inside local elementary schools.
But the need is growing. Our waitlist is expanding, and more schools are asking for help. We don’t want to say “no” to any child who needs hope.
That’s where you come in.
🎯 Join us for our 9th Annual Golf Tournament
📅 Thursday, September 25, 2025
📍 Adams Pointe Golf Club, Blue Springs
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Register a team for a day filled with fun, food, and fundraising
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$700 per team | $175 per player
⏰ Check-in: 7:30 AM | Shotgun Start: 8:30 AM
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👉 Register or sponsor today: www.peacecounseling.org
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Together, we can turn a round of golf into a lifeline for families in need. Let’s make this our most impactful year yet—we can’t wait to see you on the green!
Honoring the Generosity That Moves Our Mission Forward
As we reflect on all that June has brought, we are overwhelmed with gratitude for those who stand with us. Your generosity does more than fund counseling sessions, it opens doors to healing, restores hope, and reminds families that they are not alone.
Because of your continued support, our mission continues to reach new lives, new schools, and new stories waiting to be changed. Your kindness fuels everything we do.
With full hearts, we thank each of our incredible donors and partners who made an impact this month:
For the past six to eight years, these faithful partners — Dan & Gigi Rippee, John Otradovec, Metcalf Auto Plaza, Greg & Jennifer Spears, and Stone Amp SEO; have stood in the gap with us. Their dedication has helped carry the vision of hope, healing, and restoration to children and families who needed it most. We deeply grateful for their faithfulness.
Thank you to Hallam Insurance & Financial Services Inc., Hefner Construction, and Mantel Teeter for stepping up as sponsors of our upcoming golf tournament.Your generosity fuels more than just an event, it extends healing, hope, and essential care to children and families across our community. We are honored to have your support for this event.
We’re thrilled to welcome our newest golf teams — Church of Coffee Creek, Brandon & Vanessa Blanchard, Tom & Debbie Reed, and Hefner Construction.Your involvement adds excitement and heart to a day filled with purpose, connection, and fun. We can’t wait to see you on the course!
To all of our faithful monthly and recurring supporters – THANK YOU from our Peace Partnership team! – Stone AMP SEO, Zane & Melissa Morerod, Children’s Services Fund of Jackson County, Mark McDonald, Jondy & Heather Britton, Matt & Kristy Newton, Mark & Cathy McGaughey, Greg & Jennifer Spears, Roger & Jennifer Madsen, Metcalf Auto Plaza, Mike & Jan McGraw, Willie & Adia Valdes, Shelly Schuman, Mike & Carol Jackson, Blue Springs Christian Church, Linda Hartman, Dave & Rosie Bourland, Rudy & Stacy Blahnik, Mike & Tracy Pruitt, Clayton & Pam Wooldridge, Dan & Gigi Rippee, Andre & Rose Fantasma, Kevin Quinn, Genesis Counseling, Scott & Lydia Hurley, Jon & Naomi Thompson, John Otradovec, Lance & Mandi Pollard, Tamara Stroud, Rick & Kathy Daulton, Aaron Linn, Joel & Ruthie Morris, Church at Coffee Creek, John & Vicki Hefner, Jenny Glasgow, Denise Israel, Summit Springs Church, Phil & Jo Rydman, Brandon & Vanessa Blanchard, Jason & Val Schram, and Rick & Jan Britton.
Together, your support is changing lives. Thank you for being an essential part of this mission.
Would you like to tour our office or grab a coffee or meal together to hear more about our work in the community?
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