A Guide To Making Smarter Choices
- Dr. Jon Thompson
- 24 minutes ago
- 9 min read
Let’s get straight to the point.
You’re staring down a big life decision: a new job, how to navigate a messy break up, or whether to finally forgive your college roommate for eating your last donut.[1] Don’t start with “how”.
Starting with “how” is like trying to assemble a 1000-piece puzzle where all the puzzle pieces are the same color. You’ll get frustrated and swearing mad only to find yourself flipping the table 30-minutes in.
Instead, grab a cup of coffee (shout-out to Chingu Coffee![2]) and let’s dive into why starting with “why” and “what” will save your sanity. I’ll be borrowing wisdom from some of my favorite giga-brain thinkers: Tony Robbins, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Frederick Nietzsche, and Simon Sinek to help me write this. Admittedly, an unlikely crew for a Christian blog article but stick with me and it will all make sense.
Why “How” Is A Hot Mess
Picture of this: you’re deciding whether to move to a new city. You start with “how”.
How do I pack?
How do I find a mover?
How do I not go bankrupt in the process?
Five hours later, you’re wondering if you should just live in a tent. It’s a one-way trip to decision disasterville.
What’s worse, is that it skips the part where you concern yourself with deeper, more meaningful questions. Does this move further my future? Have I prayed about this? Does it further God’s purpose for my life? You’re so busy wondering how you’re going to make this happen you forgot to check if you’re even headed in the right direction.
“Why” is Your Personal GPS
Here’s the secret sauce: start with “why”.
Simon Sinek is a modern-day business guru. He says the best leaders begin with purpose, and I believe him. If you’re going to do that, it means asking, “Why does this matter? Will it further my Christian faith?”
If you’ve figured out your “why” (to love your neighbor as yourself or to use your gifts for God’s glory) you’ve instantly turned on your personal GPS. Now you have direction. Now you know a.) where you are, and b.) where you need to go. Suddenly, the path set before you isn’t quite as foggy.
Get your “why” nailed down and you’ve instantly won half the battle.
Next, the “What”
Once your “why” is clear move on to "what". What’s the actual thing you’re doing? Taking that job? Mending a friendship? Tony Robbins is famous for saying, “Clarity is king.” So, to get clear, ask yourself, “What do I want?” but be careful! That can be a trap.
The flipside of that question will help you avoid the trap. Here’s a question that will tell you exactly what you really want:
“What am I willing to suffer for?”[3]
This will help you develop your blueprint for moving forward. Without it, you’re just hoping for a miracle. Spoiler alert: There’s no need for God to work a miracle if all you have to do is exert some effort. But if you do exert the effort, and you get your "why" and "what" clear, you’ll watch things start to lineup in your life.
Now, the “How”
Here’s where the magic happens. Once your "why and what" are set, the "how" rolls in rather effortlessly. Dr. Jordan Peterson says decisions should give you your life meaning, even through the tough stuff.
Maybe the choice you know you need to make will help you carry your cross with purpose. So, if your "why" is to honor God by serving others, and your "what" is to volunteer at the nearest homeless shelter, the "how" is simple: sign up, show up, and smile while you’re helping. You don’t need to panic. There’s no need for a meltdown.
Friedrich Nietzsche has written many profound things, but here’s a gem:
“Decide slowly, and hold firm to the decision.”
Pray, think, seek wise counsel. Then stick to it like glue. The "how" isn’t a monster anymore. It’s just the next step.
Real Life, Real Laughs
Several years ago, I faced a daunting choice: stay in a comfortable but soul draining job or leap to something scarier but more aligned with my purpose. I started with how – how do I pay bills? How do we not starve? What if this doesn’t work out? I was a mess. I worried so much that I would have dreams about it.
Then, I hit pause, prayed, and asked why. The answer manifested as quickly as it was clear: To use my gifts to further God’s kingdom. To find joy in serving Him and helping others. Instantly, almost without effort, the how fell into place. Looking back, I’m embarrassed of my then panicked state, picturing Jesus shaking his head,
“Oh ye of little faith.”
Your Turn
You might be in a similar boat. Maybe you’re wrestling with forgiving someone. You know you should, you just can’t seem to find the nerve. Don’t start with, “How do I even talk to them?”
Instead, ask why: to obey God‘s call to love. To free yourself from the chains of unforgiveness. Then ask what: to offer forgiveness. Then the how becomes effortless.
Call them. Meet up. Speak from the heart.
It probably won’t go smooth. That’s okay. Don’t take it personal. We argue over hurt feelings FAR MORE than we argue over ideas. It’s amazing what you can do when you take the situation seriously but not yourself.
Some of the greatest minds I’ve ever read and listen to – Tony, Jordan, Frederick, and Simon all agree: purpose and clarity beats chaos every day of the week.
Don’t take yourself too seriously. Trust the process. Act as though everything depends on you and pray as though everything depends on God. Now go do what you know you need to do.
[1] Donuts are proof that God loves us. If your roommate eats your last one, cut them out of your life forever. You don’t need that kind of negativity.
[2] Chingu means “friend” in Korean. Chingu Coffee is hands down one of the best coffee shops in the KC area. It’s just West of the Plaza. Good coffee and good people. Highly recommended.
[3] This is one of the most formidable questions that was ever posed to me. I trust it will be as helpful to you as it has been to me.
We’re Almost Full, and We’d Hate to Start Without You!
The 9th Annual Peace Partnership Golf Classic is nearly here, and we’ve been blown away by the response. So many generous friends have already stepped up and we are incredibly grateful.
Spots are filling fast, and this event wouldn’t be the same without you. Whether you’ve played before or supported in other ways, your presence has made a difference and it wouldn’t be the same without you.
This tournament is more than a day of golf. It’s a day where laughter meets purpose, where stories are shared, and where every swing helps bring hope because of people like you.
Last year, your generosity helped to provide over 3,800 counseling sessions, including more than 1,500 completely free to students right inside their schools. But the need has only grown, and we can’t meet it without you.
Here’s how to help
✔️ Register your team
✔️ Choose your sponsorship level
✔️ Donate a prize or auction item
✔️ Share this with someone who you think would love to support us in any capacity.
$700 per team | $175 per player
⏰ Check-in: 7:30 AM | Shotgun Start: 8:30 AM
🍳 Includes breakfast, lunch, drinks, and awards
🎟 Plus contests, raffles, and a silent auction throughout the day
👉 Register or sponsor today: www.peacecounseling.org
📞 Questions? Contact Ashley Kirn at 816.716.1847 or ashley@peacecounseling.org
Together, we can turn a round of golf into a lifeline for families in need. Let’s make this our most impactful year yet, we can’t wait to see you on the green!
As we start August, our hearts are full for our faithful supporters
Every month, we pause to reflect, and this one has reminded us just how powerful your partnership truly is. Your generosity does far more than fund counseling sessions. It creates safe places for healing. It gives families the courage to keep going. It tells children and teens, "You matter, and you are not alone".
Because of your continued support, we’re reaching more students, more schools, and more lives ready to be transformed. Your compassion is behind every breakthrough and every story of restored hope.
Whether you gave through a recurring monthly commitment, supported an upcoming event, or responded to a special communication, you made a difference.
We are deeply grateful.
To Our Monthly Donors
Your faithful, ongoing support is the heartbeat of our mission. Month after month, you choose to show up for families who need hope and healing and that kind of consistency is priceless.
We are especially grateful for your dedication and trust.
Aaron Linn, Andre & Rose Fantasma, Church at Coffee Creek, Clayton & Pam Wooldridge, Dan & Gigi Rippee, Danny Collins, Dave & Rosie Bourland, Greg & Jennifer Spears, Jason & Val Schram, Jenny Wrobleski, Jondy & Heather Britton, Jon & Naomi Thompson, John Otradovec, Linda Hartman, Mark & Cathy McGaughey, Mark McDonald, Matt & Kristy Newton, Metcalf Auto Plaza, Mike & Jan McGraw, Mike & Tracy Pruitt, Lance & Mandi Pollard, Phil & Jo Rydman, Rick & Kathy Daulton, Roger & Jennifer Madsen, Lydia Hurley, Shelly Schuman, Stone Amp SEO, Tamara Stroud, Willie & Adia Valdes, Zane & Melissa Morerod, Children’s Services Fund of Jackson County, Roger Lantz, Blue Springs Christian Church, Joel & Ruthie Morris, John & Kimberly Shrader, Roger Lantz, Stephen & Natalia Ray, Mike & Carol Jackson, Rudy & Stacy Blahnik, Genesis Counseling, Denise Israel, John & Vicki Hefner
To Our Golf Tournament Supporters
Thank you for choosing to invest not only in an event but in the impact that follows. Your support helps us create an unforgettable day of connection, while raising the funds needed to support families in crisis.
We’re grateful to partner with you.
Jim Hubbard Insurance, Kennedy’s Jewelers, Mizkan America Inc, Rise Baking Company, LLC, EPR Properties, Hill Pro-Motion Physical Therapy, KC Dumpster Company, Lee & Debbie Miller, Metcalf Auto Plaza, Paths Law Firm, Phil Rydman, Porky Products, Rebecca McConville Consulting, Tony Pizzutelli, ConCarpet Inc, Kansas City Zoo, Main Event, Outlaw Cigar, NOKA, Sky Zone, Kendra Scott, Hannah Deer Photography, Embrey Aviation, QT, Scheels, Chicken & Pickle, The Living Stone, Parkville Wine House, Ben Holiday Distillery, McClains, Union Station, National WWI Museum and Memorial, Pirtle Winery, Crumbl Cookie, Chick-fil-a
To Those Who Gave Through Spring Reports and Annual Communications
Your thoughtful response to our updates helps carry the mission forward in moments that matter most. You read the stories, saw the need, and chose to act—and we’re so grateful you did.
Benevity, Inc., Blue Springs Christian Church, Joel & Ruthie Morris, John & Kimberly Shrader, Stephen & Natalia Ray
From every corner of this ministry, we thank you. Your generosity is the reason we can keep showing up—for kids, for families, and for healing that lasts.
Would you like to tour our office or grab a coffee or meal together to hear more about our work in the community?
Contact Ashley Kirn, our Director of Development, at: 816.716-1847 or ashley@peaceounseling.org. We want to get to know you and personally thank you for supporting our mission. To make a donation through our website, please click on the link below.
There's still time to support our mission and partner with us on our Spring Report!
Behind every counseling session is a story of real heartbreak, real hope, and the chance to say “yes” when it matters most.
If you haven’t read our latest appeal, we invite you to take a moment. It’s a powerful reminder of why your support matters now more than ever.
📖 Read the story that’s moving hearts and changing lives:
Together, we can keep saying “yes” to the families who need us most.
Have you or someone you know been helped by Peace Partnership or Genesis Counseling? If so, would you please consider paying it forward to help another find healing along their journey? We are asking anyone who is not currently partnering with us financially to consider donating $100/year for the next 3 years to help make a difference in someone else’s life. Collectively, we can help SO MANY PEOPLE! Please consider a gift today. Call the office for help getting your gift set up or choose a recurring donation on our website here. We are so grateful for your help changing lives!
